Holyflaps
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'I've made peace with the past. It can still fuck off though'
'I don't have anything against stupid people.'
'Family. Because apparently blocking everyone makes Christmas tricky'
'I've stopped expecting people to have common sense'
'Practice random acts of kindness today'
'People say I'm hard to read. Good. I'm not a fucking book'
'I have absolutely no problem admitting when I'm wrong. ...I imagine'
'I'm not negative. I'm accurately fucking underwhelmed'
'ChatGPT said your Mum is a slag'
'What do you do for a living? I do my best Sue. I do my best'
'Some people bring joy wherever they go. Some whenever they go'
'...has seen better days..." Your face'
'If you need a problem I'm right fucking here'
'I'd answer the phone after 9pm for you'
'I'm a fucking lovely person. This is just testing'
'Menopause. All the hormones of puberty. None of the skin elasticity'
'Of all the shit I've found on the internet. You are my fucking favourite'
'Due to personal reasons. Fuck this shit'
'I love surprises. Not visitors. Fuck off!'
'I bent down to pick something up. Anyway I live here now'
'I'd choose you again. Which raises fucking concerns'
'I've learnt that not every thought needs to be said out loud.'
